Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Spoilers Begin Here

If you have any intention of going to see Spider-Man 3 in the near or later future. Do not read my post.

SPIDERMAN 3 FUCKING ROCKED.

No matter what any critic, pundit, antagonist or Hitler-look-alike say this, movie pwned the previous two and to quote Bono McNagy "Spiderman 3 rocked the balls and asses of everyone in the theatre." I can start by agreeing with this statement and then adding that not only were balls and asses rocked, but that this movie produced its own kind of radiation that grew the balls of anyone who saw it and yes I am including women.

I am also not afraid to say that after the sexy dance sequence that Tobey McGuire I felt like having a cigarette, but I didn't cause smoking is wrong (See Previous Post). I am more than certain that everyone else who saw that movie had dreams about sleeping with Peter Parker, except me. I don't have homo-erotic dreams thanks to anti-bodies that prevent that.

The fight scenes are indescribable. Black Spiderman owns people. Topher Grace is awesome...r. Oh, not to mention there are, count'em, three villains in this film. The Goblin, Sandman and Venom... makes for one fucking train wreck of a time. Buildings falling over, people getting killed. I loved this film and so will you.

It will be released on DVD sometime. Until then may your balls be rocked by this film.