The Ninth Day Of Waynemas

On the ninth day of Waynemas the Empire gave to me
Nine Clydes-a-scornin'
Eight Waynes-a-grinning
Seven Colbert's Winning
Six Broken Laptops
Five Gnomish Zings
Four Star Trek Nerds
Three Crazed Lens
Two Girls In Love
and a copy of Soul Cal III